May 10, 2010

It's all about the build up


I've never met an actualization that was able to completely satisfy and comfort enough to make me feel totally okay with what just happened. At worst, I'm left disappointed and with that weird feeling like you got short-changed by somebody foreign and surly and there isn't much you can argue against it. At best, I walk away accepting a situation that I never felt like I had control of in the first place and chalk it up to "sometimes you're the windshield, sometimes you're the bug."

If I could somehow find a way to rest an entire rapport simply on a build up that never peaks, I think that would probably make me a magician. Or Spiderman. I can't think of a more criminal disservice to any relationship than to dismiss the build up. You've got to let chemistry develop before sparks can fly. If you jump the gun, it generally always comes back to shoot you in the ass.

The trick about chemistry is that it throws a completely random but pretty much supreme variable into the rules of attraction. Chemistry is responsible for all the assholes your girlfriends date and that boyfriend you were head>heels with who you were never able to agree with.
In a city of something like 9 million people, finding a genuine connection with a stranger is not only rare, it's like a goddamn Halley's comet. So when some pheremonal cosmic force wants to take over with a shove in a fit 5'11 doe-eyed, tousle-haired direction, my attitude is WTHN (why the hell not). 

Which would be cool. If it didn't have habit of leading me to so many bad timings, awkward interactions, and always an annoyed anticlimax. I call it the lukewarm blues. In which you're pretty much left with no other sentiment than to shrug it off in order to keep from focusing in too intensely on one isolated incident of easy-come-easy-go.

I also just watched 500 Days of Summer last night, and after it being so weirdly hyped up... it kind of just made me resent Zooey Deschanel and her Zooey Deschanel brand of aloof acting.
It also made me kind of fall in love with Joseph Gordon Levitt. Brick laid the groundwork, but this kind of solidified that sentiment.
I just crowned him mayor of Babe City.



Ugh. Just look at that. Brutal.

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