August 26, 2011

In an alternate universe

From before until now. The one where the road does not fork, and I didn't say those things, and you didn't say those things, and we never had that conversation, and I didn't walk away, and you didn't let me walk away, and I didn't wait that long to tell you I loved you, and you never tested me, and I never took that pill with you, and I never came around, and I didn't read your emails, and I didn't call you back, and we never met that afternoon because I didn't follow through like I had reconsidered, and I never said yes, and you never found me.

Directionally speaking, it works like a palindrome. All the in-betweens are reserved for various black holes that congregate around the places I thought to dream when instead I chose to sleep. There is when I will feel the same as I do now. In that alternate universe, vacuumed between double walls (were I thermal-protective), I am still bulletproof. Or at the very least, I have still forgotten, and not yet recalled the fact that I am not.

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